The Unexpected Happens, Ya Know

By the time I had completed my first IUI, I was excited up to the point I was told I had already ovulated on my own and could not go through with the next step, which was insemination. “What a bummer I thought!” Who knew things such as this could happen. I mean, wasn’t my whole cycle being orchestrated externally by the doctor anyway? Let my personal experience be a guide before your journey begins to being open minded and flexible to the unexpected when undergoing infertility treatment. Again, no one told me this could happen. During infertility treatment, the unexpected happens, ya know!

But things like this do happen and medicine is not perfect. Okay I am starting to see how this works. I must go with the flow.

My next IUI went smoothly and I was able to finish with the insemination. Alas it was not meant to be when I found out the blood pregnancy test was negative. I was so sad when I found out. Then I felt even sadder when I had to tell my husband. Little did I know such information could bring such feelings of sadness to me. After 3 back to back cycles of IUI and numerous injections, blood draws and ultrasounds, hubby and I decided to take a break from all the poking and prodding. The weeks immediately afterwards, I was feeling pretty down and still pretty sad. I found myself crying at times watching tv or just while laying in bed for no apparent reason. I knew after a few weeks of crying, I was depressed. Even hubby became worried about my increasing silence and withdrawn attitude. I am usually a very upbeat and talkative character! For me at least, I was depressed after the third IUI cycle. Again, I wasn’t prepared for depression to hit! Who knew this could happen.

I wonder in retrospect, how many women out there undergo infertility treatment and experience no depression at all? I know today that I was definitely not the only one with feelings of depression. Why else would there be a weekly support group at the center. I unfortunately only became informed of the support group after our IVF class at the center. I didn’t think before starting these treatments I would need support, so it didn’t even occur to me to ask. If you’re contemplating infertility treatment, support is something you might find you need. Even if you don’t think you will need it (like me), knowing whether it is available will only benefit you later, if and when you should need it.

In all, a few other minor things did happen, but we dealt with them as they arose. I learned to ask many questions and not to leave anything behind or unanswered. Even if I thought it was a silly or unimportant question, I forced myself to ask.

Today, hubby and I have been through a total of 5 failed IUI’s. You want to talk about unexpected? I never expected to be at this point. After 2 additional rounds of IUI with injectable medication, we are still trying to conceive. Things you don’t expect to happen, can and do happen! Remember that! Wish us luck!

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